THE CHINESE DETECTIVE AND THE MOST EXPENSIVE PARROT

The Chinese Detective

A man suspected his wife seeing another man, so he hired the famous Chinese detective Chen Lee, to report any activities while was gone to work.

A few days later he received this report from the renowned detective:

Most honorable Sir,

You leave house. I watch. He come to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go in Hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she, she kiss he. He strip she, she strip he. He play with she, she play with he. I play with me. I fall off tree. I not see. No fee.

Yours truly,

Chen Lee

THE MOST EXPENSIVE PARROT
A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says:

"The parrot on the left costs 500 dollars".

"Why, does the parrot cost so much" the man asked the owner.

The owner says, "Well the parrot knows how to use a computer".

The man then asks about the next parrot to be told that this one costs 1,000 dollars because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.

Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot to be told that it costs 2,000 dollars. Needless to say this begs the question

"What can it do?"

To which the owner replies

"To be honest, I have never seen it do a thing but the other two call him boss!".